First, let me say it’s all OK. It’s all perfect. Every person is responsible for their own resolutions and shifting into joy as a way of living and BEing. That part is not your responsibility as an energy facilitator. What is your responsibility? Does guilt serve you? Let’s take a look from a ThetaHealing® perspective.
There is a lot to be said for belief work, feeling work, and shifting things energetically. A lot! But, there is another component to resolution. That’s allowing. If the person (or yourself) doesn’t allow the shifts and changes, any resolution will be temporary at best.
And, this is where new healing practitioners can become disillusioned. As a new healer, you want to help; you want people to feel and be better; and you want to help facilitate that. Yet, if the person’s issue doesn’t resolve, you feel guilty. But, should you?
Well… let’s discuss that. Ultimately, the choice for resolution is the person’s with the issue. But why would a person refuse to resolve something they consciously want to change? It’s usually because it is serving them in some way to hang on to it. They may even allow partial resolution but not 100%. As the energy facilitator, it is your responsibility to connect to Source, to listen, to share, and to help the person find the bottom belief. The bottom belief usually offers insight into how the issue serves the person – but not always. Yet, if you ask the person how it serves them to hold onto the issue, they most always know and can come up with the answer – even if they tell you they don’t know at first. That’s where the good old “But what if you did know?” question is perfect!
Make sure that you discuss with the person desiring your services how the presenting issue serves them. Belief work, feeling work, and energetic shifting are all awesome, but if you don’t also give them conscious awareness of the value of holding onto the situation or issue, then there is a pretty good chance that the issue won’t resolve, won’t resolve completely, or will only temporarily resolve. The same is true if you don’t make it to the bottom or core belief upon which all the other related beliefs are based – which interestingly enough may be the “how it is serving piece” of the equation. The core belief, if not the cake (how it is serving) will be the icing (what is holding the ‘how it is serving’ in place).
Guilt is not a self-serving feeling for an energy facilitator. So, instead of wasting your time with that, look at how you might be able to be more effective, and if it would even be possible. Be aware that if a person finds the core belief to be too challenging to address or too fearful or too painful, he or she may well use distraction and other tactics to keep you from going there – even if he or she doesn’t have conscious awareness of that core. A part of them knows and that part of them will do whatever it takes to divert you from leading them there. And, sometimes, a person doesn’t want to give up how something is serving them. They just want to be heard. Yet, sometimes if you can help them consciously identify how they are being served and give them another way to address that, they will willingly release it all (and think you are a genius!).
There is a lot to be said for the understanding that there are no coincidences. If you encounter a situation where you are wondering if you did your best or if you did what you should have done for another, it’s showing you where you might want to look within and what learning you may need to further your own growth and capabilities. It may be “all them” and have nothing to do with you. It may also be that you will learn to remember to always search for those core beliefs and to look for how holding onto them has been serving the person. It may be, too, that your connection to Source might need tweaking. There are a lot of factors that could be at play. So, let’s just say that guilt is not productive nor helpful. However, looking at the possible reasons that a person may not be progressing might be. And, always keep in mind that the person doesn’t have to let go of anything. Even if they look you in the eye and tell you they desire to. They may not be ready and you may find it most productive to resolve to the level they will allow. Then, the next time, they will be starting from a better place and you will hopefully be able to get closer to the core.
Again, we circle back to ask – which happens every time! The ‘Creator of All There Is’ is doing this with you. You have certain responsibilities, such as establishing a clear connection to Source, listening, not “decorating” with your own thoughts and feelings, and following the truths you are shown. But if you’ve done your part, you’re good. Don’t allow yourself to second-guess what you know during that connection. And remember that the person was “led” to you for a reason. Perhaps you were the only one who they would confide in at this point in time. Perhaps you are the only one they would allow to penetrate ANY of their protective layers. Perhaps they even “owed” you a debt from another time and the repayment is to point out to you – in a kind and gentle way – how you can serve others better by changing what you do or remembering what you’ve been taught more thoroughly. It could be you remind them of a favorite Uncle or Aunt. It could be any number of things. All, though, gifts of one sort or another and never a cause for guilt or doubt or disillusionment. Let Source energy get you to the bottom of your own issue with the other person not getting to theirs. That is a beautiful gift.
Be aware of how life events are showing you about you. Don’t take on the burdens and responsibilities of others out of some sense of obligation or misguided understanding of what energy facilitation is all about. You are responsible for you. Each person is responsible for him or herself. You can assist others to find their resolutions. And they, in turn, can point out to you (consciously or not) where you have unfinished resolutions. That is a win-win. Look within if you begin to doubt your own effectiveness. You are “brought” those who are a good fit for you and you for them. Take advantage of every moment of that. Energy facilitation is not an egoic process. It’s not about you but, in a way, it is. It’s about becoming aware of you and how life is showing you the way to the highest and best expression of you. Be grateful to your clients, family, and friends who are helping to bring this gift directly to you. In turn, your efforts to assist them and others will flourish and bring you beautiful amazing “rewards” of Spirit.
Yea! It’s ALL good. Live in gratitude and love and joy with pure intention. That will do it!
From my heart to yours, from my soul to yours… Mahalo…Linda
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