Friends are great. They each have different strengths. They each have specialized likes and dislikes. All that makes for great interest and support.
Yet, there are some aspects that are less optimal such as the degree of loyalty and honesty, availability, and non-endearing personality quirks. But, because friendship is so valuable, most of us learn to take each friend with whatever they bring and whatever they are willing to offer.
All that said, what if there was a friend who was absolutely perfect for you in every way? What if this friend would always be there for you under any circumstances, loved everything you love, was good to go for anything you wanted when you wanted, was supremely loyal, and always had your back. Sounds awesome, right? You can have such a friend. And, in case you haven’t guessed, it’s you!
We don’t typically think of being our own best friend. Yet, it makes perfect sense. Who knows you best? Who loves you most? Who values everything about you?
But wait… do you love yourself? Do you value you and what you have to offer? Do you enjoy your own company?
Perhaps the truth hurts. Perhaps you, because you think you know the real you, don’t feel you deserve to be unconditionally loved. Perhaps you don’t feel you have anything of real value to offer. Perhaps you feel that what you can project for others to see is more real to you than what you believe about yourself.
So, start there. Take a good look at what you believe about you. Would you choose you as a friend? If not, why? What is it you think isn’t good enough? Be really honest. This is about changing your entire life for the better.
If you are not your own best friend first, how can you expect to even know how to be a great friend to someone else? How can you be an authentic friend and really allow others to know the “real” you if you don’t love yourself and love what makes you uniquely you? This is really important.
We aren’t taught to be our own best friend. Yet, some of us learn how to be because of our external experiences. The caveat with this is that you may come to feel that the only one who can be completely trusted is you. So, you make friends but they are compartmentalized. Different people may know different parts of you. Or not. This is one way that you may consider yourself a friend to you.
However, a more healthy and expansive way is to really evaluate how you feel about you and how you feel about your relationships with others. Learn to love yourself unconditionally. From that love, trust yourself. From that love, enjoy yourself. From that love, know that you are worthy and deserving of the best life has to offer. Then, find friends who support that within you.
Instead of walling off most of your heart to protect it, and as a gesture of self-friendship, take the next step and really look at the core of why you feel that is the best way to live and relate (in self-protection mode). Then be a really good friend to yourself and heal the core that would keep you from being anything but open and honest and loving and compassionate. Does this mean sharing every detail of your life with everyone else? No. It means practicing proper discernment with others but being completely honest with yourself.
You are amazing. You have a uniqueness that allows anything you offer to be special. When you know that about you and honor that and love that about you, you become your own best friend. From that understanding and truth, you can then share you with others. And, you can share on your own terms, but from the space and vibration of authenticity and honoring the truth of you.
Love is a great equalizer. Make sure your relationships are on level playing fields. Make sure they are based on a foundation of self-love, self-honor, and self-respect. That has the potential to allow everyone to be a best friend in some capacity. How wonderful would it be to know that and feel that in all relationships? The choice is yours to make. Choose you. Why? Because you rock!
“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” Dr. Seuss
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